Cut your hair, James! Cut your hair, John! Cut your hair, Robert!
Cut your hair, Michael!
Cut your hair, William! Cut your hair, David!
Cut your hair, Joseph!
Cut your hair, Richard & Thomas & Charles & Christopher & Daniel!
& Matthew & Donald!
& George & Paul!
Cut your hair, Mark!
Steven & Anthony & Edward you can keep yours.
But Joshua, no.
And Kevin & Kenneth.
Brian & Ronald & Andrew & Jeffrey & Ryan & Jason & Gary, you have 3 more weeks, tops.
Nicholas, Eric, Frank, Justin, Jonathan, Brandon: I can’t even talk about it.
Jacob & Larry & Scott & Stephen, I’ve already made appointments for tomorrow!
Gregory, we’ll talk in private.
Cut your hair, Raymond! And Benjamin!
And Tyler! And Walter! And Dennis!
Harold (see Harry, below).
Zachary, Jerry, Henry, and Douglas, you cut your hair right now!
Alexander, Jack, Aaron, Arthur, and Kyle, you follow right after them (but clean the clippers first)!
Jeremy & Terry & Albert & Adam, you embarrass the mirror every morning! Cut your hair!
Harry, if you lose an ‘r’ and add an ‘i’, we’ll talk.
Willie & Austin: at least comb it once in awhile!
Cut your hair, Carl & Christian! Dylan & Samuel & Joe!
Ralph & Gerald & Roger & Fred & Eugene: you have it bad enough.
Ethan & Todd, just ask for a trim.
Jose & Bruce & Louis: I wouldn't even know what to tell them to do.
Jordan & Clarence: just look at Nathan & Roy!*
Howard & Randy: just give it up. You’re not 8 anymore.
Cut your hair, Noah & Patrick & Billy & Lawrence & Cody! Earl & Chad & Logan & Keith!
Francis, Shawn, Bobby: you’re safe - for now.
But don’t even get me started on Gabriel & Caleb & Wayne!
Oh Wayne!
*They’re cutting their hair!
